Fractured Plans


Exercise they said.  It’s good for you they said.  Well, thanks to exercising I now have a fracture in my foot!

I wish I could tell you I fractured it by fighting bad guys or practicing my hardcore parkour skills but no, alas I was walking, just straight up walking.  In my defence, it’s easy to hurt yourself doing something difficult, however, it takes skill to hurt yourself doing something easy.

There are some really nice walking trails in the park very close to my apartment.  It’s a nice way to escape the city and just be in nature. Or so I thought.

My ill-fated walk on Sunday started out quite nice.  I had my Ipod cranked up, the weather was hot but not humid, and there was a cool breeze.  The first 10 minutes were great!

Then things took a turn.  Or a twist in my case.  As I was walking down a slight hill, my foot slipped out from under me and went sideways.  All of my weight then went down onto it.  I heard a pop and then shouted out several choice words.  Thankfully no people were around but some very offended birds flew away in disgust.

At first, I didn’t think it was that bad.  I thought if I kept walking I would feel better.  In retrospect, I now question my logic of “My foot hurts.  I think I’ll walk some more on it to make it feel better!”  To quote Iron Man “Not a great plan.”

I continued my walk of pain.  With each step I took the music on my Ipod was less enjoyable.  The weather turned from nice to Death Valley hot. The breeze ceased and a giant wave of humidity blew in from Florida.  I felt like I had been dropped into a new Bear Grylls reality show. It was now me against the elements.

I began to contemplate turning around but I had now made it to the point where I was pretty much half way through the trail so I decided to press on.  The heat was now in full swing.  I starting seeing mirages.  I saw a beautiful oasis with clean, cool water.  I saw an all you can eat steak buffet.  I saw Meryl Streep sitting on a bench with an outstretched hand holding a screenplay she wanted me to co-star in with her.  

The pain in my foot brought me back to reality.   By the grace of the Lord I had reached the bottom of the entrance to the trail!  I slowly worked my way up to the top, out of the deadly nature.  As I got closer, I could hear the sweet sounds of cars driving by. Civilization at last! I found a bench at the opening of the trail and took a well-deserved rest.

After a few minutes of sitting I summoned up my strength and walked the rest of the way home.  It took me a while but I made it.  I ascended the stairs, opened the door, and fell onto my beloved blue couch.  

I still didn’t fully realize what was wrong with my foot.  I thought I just needed to rest and ice it and I’d be good to go for work the next day.  I thought wrong. When I woke up the next morning I took a cautious first step and was immediately meet with agonizing pain.  I knew then that something was really wrong with my foot. I called out of work and began to scramble to find a doctor. The first urgent care I found was pretty close to me but when I tried to make an appointment, I found out their X-Ray machine was down.  So I looked again and found an urgent care in Chevy Chase, MD and booked an appointment online.  I Ubered up to the office and the rest is history.

I’m planning on going back into work Thursday.  My doctor told me I should be able to move easier by then.  Next Monday I’ll go back in for another X-Ray and we’ll take it from there.  Unfortunately, either way, I’ll be wearing my boot for the next couple of weeks.  But like my grandmother said when I was on the phone with her “At least you didn’t fall and hit your head on a rock and bleed out!”

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